I really can't sleep yesterday. Woke up in the middle of the night again. Yesterday, I tried calling him 3 times. Sent him a sms. He's not picking up and not replying my sms. I'm telling myself that he has gone to bed. Is it a lie to myself? I called him again the first thing after I woke up. Still not picking up. Guessed, haven't wake up yet.
My nightmare: I dreamt of him. Those previous one were those I saw him with the girl. Happy and enjoying. But this time was he pick up my call, I was happy and glad. However, he said cruel words to me. It's even worst than the first dream. I was so afraid that I couldn't go back to sleep anymore. I'm really afraid of losing him.
Today is Wesak Day. I'm going for a pray. Really have to pray for peace, calmness and wisdom. This is all I need right now.
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